Small Choices

The other day I posted an entry that linked to “An Open Letter to Pastors”. I’ve been reading around more about Gary Lamb and I want to say that I’m really hurting for his situation. I’m thankful that he has a clear theology of grace and that he is open to talking about his mistakes. I really respect that he’s not hiding from the issue and is open to it. You can read about it on his blog:

As I was reading briefly through his blog I had two observations:
First one, this paragraph is devastating:

BTW, I will be posting another post this week that you don’t want to miss. I have received over 30 emails from pastors (all anonymous) confessing to be involved currently in sexual affairs. As I read these emails it was like someone punched me in the gut. NO ONE knows what you’re going through like I do and I want to give you guys the reality of what your involved in but I want to take some time to allow God to get my thoughts straight before I post.

It is amazingly sad to me that there are 30 church leaders who are currently hiding out in and living their lives in the darkness…I’m thankful that they’ve voiced (anonymously) there sin and they know it’s there. But I’m overwhelmed…I mean, these are just the guys that know about Gary…it’s scary to think how many there are. The affair bit is bothersome for obvious reasons…but the what is happening to these guys internally is the really sad thing for the Kingdom…
Second thing was this…And please know that I am not saying this to shame or belittle Gary as I respect what God has done through and what God is doing in him through this time…
Is this…if you look at his last three posts from top to bottom it goes:
1. Letter people about the consequences he’s paying for his actions
2. Confession online..that’s brave, it’s not an anonymous post…
3. It’s him celebrating 100 baptisms…
Here’s my thought on this: Ministry and work of the Kingdom can still appear like all is well, while leaders are internally dying. ‘Success’ in ministry is not a sin-repellant…if anything it’s the opposite.
I’ll end with this…please pray for me about this stuff. Honestly, I don’t struggle with a lot of ‘normal guy issues’ but this isn’t to say that I’m immune. The slope of moral failure is lots of small bad choices that lead to an apex…and the fallout of it is hard and fast. I don’t want to be a stat or a sad story. I don’t want another career. I don’t want to betray Jen and I’s covenant. I want Maisie to be able to trust her dad always…and this all begins in the small things. So pray that I make lots of really good small choices!

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  1. Mike Penny on July 15, 2009 at 4:16 pm

    Amen brother, that is why I try to always error on the side of caution and often times catch flack for it or am misunderstood.

    I really appreciate you asking for prayer about this, when you don’t really struggle with this, but understand that it can happen to any of us.

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