For the past few nights Maisie has not slept well at all…I mean, it’s been brutal. Jen has been having a rough time. And it was getting frustrating. She would suddenly get pretty high fevers and she was teething like crazy….like four teeth coming in at a the same time. Not cool for her. Certainly not cool for us.
So Jen ended up taking Maisie into a clinic yesterday and we found out that she has an ear infection. I, being the compassionate dad, was trying to tell Jen, “It’s no big deal. She’s just teething and it’ll be fine.” There’s a reason God gives women more intuition than men…we would waste and our insensitivity would overrun it anyway! Now, Maisie is doing better and has some anti-biotics. She was back to her feisty little self today…took a long nap (yes!) and even spent a few hours sans mom without losing it.
But here is what I’m learning through this…We all have issues. We all have our emotional ‘ear infections’…we could call this emotional infections. There are two ways to deal with them: My way: ignore it and pretend it’s something else. I think most of like to do this. In my case, I didn’t want Maisie to go to a clinic because I didn’t want to pay for it. I didn’t want to have to learn it could be worse…We do this with our own stuff too. We don’t want to deal with what’s real because it might be even worse than we think. Or we don’t want to deal with it because it may cost us too much to deal with what is going on. The sad thing is that our pain, if not dealt with, can become normal and we forget that we ever existed in a world without our wounds. We get so good at deceiving others of what is going on, that we start to even believe it ourselves.
The second way is to deal with our things in the light: Something doesn’t feel right and therefore we need to discover what is causing the un-rightness. It is worth confronting the fear of the unknown in order to have hope that what is going on can be redeemed. I know from recent experience that dealing with issues straight on is painful. It is not easy and does not help us ‘look good’, for those of us who feel like we have to wear the mask of everything being ‘fine.’ I had many days where I wished that I could be the together person…the person with all the right answers and all the right things to say. But engaging in the issues that we were facing was exhausting and confusing at times. But by grace, God gave us what we needed when we needed it in order to bring our stuff into the light. And to deal with them there…in the place where we acknowledge with God and others what is going on.
It’s freaky to really pursue what’s going on inside of us when something is telling us that what’s there isn’t all good. But regardless of whether we seek it out or not, it’s still there. It’s the way in which we deal with them that makes the difference. In the book of 1 John, John urges us to walk in the light as God is in light. If we were to apply this passage to this topic, then it becomes an issue of obedience and spiritual vitality to deal with what what is going on in our lives.
So, this is the stuff that I get reminded of when I am in the process of being a negligent parent!